Of Updates, Confessions and Random thoughts

First the Update...

The test was for TB. It's called the Tuberculosis Skin PPD test where they inject bacterial proteins into your body and look for a reaction. As far as this test goes, I personally feel the interpretations are ambiguous. My body showed a very strong positive reaction which could have been indicative of TB but then again, since I have been given the BCG vaccine, a positive reaction is not unexpected. But here's what I find disturbing (too strong a word) - none of the doctors I asked could explain why I should have shown such a disturbingly (yes, I did lose sleep over it, imagining my lungs to be racked with TB and dismally staring at the prospect of curing myself of TB within 2 months while simultaneously infecting all who come in contact with me. tsk.) strong reaction. Makes me feel that medicine is highly empirical in nature. But I don't blame them. Having delved a little bit in Cell and Molecular Biology (it rocks!) I know what scientists are against and its a challenge which modern science has only just begun to grasp the magnanimity of.


Confession... This is turning out to be a Confessional blog after all.

Random thought... Is my Chemical Engineering so volatile? Today I had to face the practical problem of designing a system for dissolving CO2 in water, and guess what... Gas absorbers didn't cross my mind :( until I saw a design on the internet.

I'm hoping that's not the case.

fret fret...

Worries

... they never get over, do they? Maybe it is that I choose to worry.

It's time to get my medical tests done... and just when I thought I was getting a really good deal out of life, life's back at me, at my throat this time - compensating for the highs. Maybe I have been too fortunate. Now I'm just getting too cynical.

Anyways, so like I was saying, I had to get some test done for disease X. What should have been a routine test resulting in no response from my body, or at the very best a minimal response, has turned into the my latest obsession. My body has chosen to give an all out response. A response that most doctors seem to shudder to find in their patients. Extensive disapproval and a barrage of other tests. Due tomorrow. Implying that I fast till 12 noon. A look suggesting that my good fortune has finally turned around, sending a chill down my spine. Not quite, but almost. Still - Shiver.

Not quite a NDE (Near Death Experience) but effectively, this trip to the doctor's has converted me into a believer or at the very least made me aware of my hypocrisy. God, I say, If you exist, here's your opportunity to prove it. I wait till after the tests tomorrow to decide if I'm an agnostic or a believer.

Of course, I still have to get the tests done, but that won't stop my mind from fearing the worst. Not 'the' worst, but one of the worse worsts. For there are other worries which will certainly qualify the adjective worst.

But, I digress for I have the attention span of a goldfish. I am a bit of a hypochondriac. Some of ou may vouch for it. Shortly after, I started feeling out of breath. A climb up a flight of stairs resulted in my panting heavily.

If I weren't so worried right now, I would have found all this absolutely hilarious. I still do, but for the life of me, I can't laugh. Not right now.

So anyways, I think these tests will take some time. And there are more too. Thanks to wikipedia, I now know what exactly each test does and what it's outcome should be. In happier times I would have thanked wiki, but now its just fuelling the hypochondria in me.

I shall hope for the best tomorrow, in the meanwhile, I Fret...